I've been sick for 3 days, therefore, Fischer's routine, our routine, is all sorts of screwed up.  Which means, I have a big-time deregulated toddler on my hands.  He's mouthy and easily agitated.  He wanted to leave therapy today because his OT suggested they take turns hiding during their game of hide-and-seek.  He NEVER wants to leave OT. 

Fischer is effected by each of the senses, but must work especially hard with proprioceptive input.  For those unfamiliar with the terminology, proprioception comes from our nervous system and is a form of sensory input that makes us spatially aware of our muscles, limbs, and joints.  A lot of kids with proprioceptive dysfunction seem uncoordinated or have difficulty gauging their movements.  They might not move out of the way fast enough when a ball comes toward their head.  I'm a huge baseball fan, so I like to use the sport as an example.  Good baseball pitchers have multiple pitches in their arsenal:  two seam, four seam, splitter, off-speed, sinker, etc.  Perfecting these pitches requires improved proprioceptive ability (delivery, velocity, gripping, arm movement), which can be trained.  They improve their proprioceptive abilities when they practice and train with their pitching coach.  Likewise, Fischer's proprioception improves when he "trains" with his OT.  Or, say I had one to many dirty martinis one night and got pulled over.  Police officers would gauge my proprioception if they suspected I might be over the legal limit.  If I were intoxicated, I might not be able to walk a straight line without looking down at my feet.  (Which by the way, never happens.  Well...the driving bit never happens.) 

Fischer is a big-time sensory seeker and he NEEDS rough-play- crashing, pulling, jumping, heavy lifting, wrestling,  It improves body awareness and his ability to focus.  Our morning routine consists of building tents with heavy, weighted pillows, jumping, piggy and horseback rides, running and crashing.  In the afternoon, we play on the playground, build forts with bricks, climb up dirt or snow piles, or play in the snow.  We haven't done any of this for the past 3 days.  Routine is of the utmost importance to any child with a sensory disorder.  Fischer needs to prepare his nervous system for what's coming.  He seeks out excessive proprioceptive input because he is essentially trying to regulate himself.  His nervous system needs calming.  When he gets too touchy-feely, can't sit still, or starts crashing into things, he needs more heavy work. 

Because I caught his sensory problems at such a young age, many of Fischer's issues have subsided.  SPD is neurological and it's possible to change how his brain interprets sensory input because it is not yet fully developed.  (At least, that's how I understand it.)  He started OT shortly after he turned 3, so he's been seeing his therapist for over a year.  In addition, he has learned coping mechanisms for a lot of his issues. But we also have to work very hard with the rough-play and heavy work to calm his nervous system.  A lot of kids, especially little boys, like to play rough, but Fischer needs this heavy work as a part of his play diet. 

Unless you spend a lot of time with Fischer, more than likely, you wouldn't even notice his sensory problems.  He sometimes hugs his cousins or friends too hard, breaks things or crashes into stuff.  Luckily, he's an extremely intelligent kid and has been able to hit all of his milestones despite his struggles.  He's not clumsy, and I think he'll probably be good at sports.  But that doesn't mean that he isn't working really hard to behave in a manner that is socially appropriate. 

Tonight, during Fischer's gymnastics class, I had a "light-bulb moment".  It was unavoidable, but he had OT this morning as well.  And with me being sick, he was deregulated from the get-go and it was too much.  Normally, he listens, follows instructions and does pretty good.  He'll get distracted and overwhelmed by the lights and noise sometimes, but can usually rein himself back in.  He struggled tonight and wouldn't participate in a few things.  Because it was an "off" day, his coping mechanisms were decreased.  He wandered around more than usual and his attention was down.  But I realized that every time he drifted off, he was reined back in, either by his teacher or himself.  It took a bit longer than usual, but even on a bad day, he was able to self-regulate in a social situation.  That is HUGE!  At the end of class, he ran over to the side-lines, hunched over and waited for the rest of the class to do their hand shakes.  Others probably see this act either as a sad form of withdraw or as defiance.  I see this as a small victory.  He was able to remove himself from an uncomfortable and over-stimulating situation and find a way to self-regulate without running out of the room to me.  Today is an oxymoron.  It's a good bad day!  Fischer is just like every other kid, only he's not! 

If you are easily offended and you procreate, you might need to find foster care for your child during the toddler years; especially if your young is of the male species.  Boys are fearless cannibals who devour you with their ruthless toddler talk.  Over the past few days, the offspring has spout off multiple opinions and phrases that I hope and pray he never repeats to anyone other than myself.  My feathers are not easily ruffled.  I can typically deal with most of his neanderthal bents, not that I have a choice.  This week, I'm reaching a boiling point.

Today, Fischer told me that his supper tasked like "rotten chicken poop."  Seriously kid, I might fail in the supermom race on a daily basis, but I can cook.  Now, you're telling me that my culinary skills are lacking as well?  Many times, his sensory issues with taste cause issues based on the type of day he's had.  I asked what the problem was because he'd eaten the same thing at my mother's house earlier in the week.  (Responds) "It's just gross mom."  I'd ask him how he knew what chicken poop tasted like, but I'm pretty sure that his answer might make me gag. 

Last night, he kept putting his bottom in my face and asking me to smell his butt.  Really?  Then came the gas.  Offspring says, "mom, how's that smell", then laughs.  What is the deal with boys and gas?  I have always taught him that gas is not something to laugh about; we should just say excuse me.  I suppose i shouldn't be surprised, because many of the men I surround myself with are unabashed about their bodily functions; even grown men think gas is funny. 

Similarly, a few days ago, he kept putting his feet in my face and asking me if they stunk.  I asked him to get his feet out of my face and the little shit responds with, "oh, sorry mom, I thought that was dad's face."  I'm pretty sure I sound like I'm raising a houligan.  I'm really not; he's actually quite a thoughtful, sweet, polite kid.- when he's not with me.  Unfortunately, that is 95% of the time. 

These antics pissed me off.  Hey... I can actually vent AND curse because he can't hear me.  I can no longer utilize many of my favorite words for fear that he will repeat.  And he WILL repeat.  Apparently, 'dammit' is a pleasing word for a toddler to regurgitate.. Daddy's friend says the "F-word".  Fischer knows that the "F-word" is naughty.  Technically, he doesn't say it.  And he chooses the most inopportune moments to tell me that he doesn't say the "F-word", like when we are in public...with old people around...and other kids.  As you have probably already guessed, he uses the actual word when telling me it isn't appropriate to say it.  One of our biggest struggles is impulse control and his utter lack of a filter.  Fischer's SPD causes impulse control issues.  He cannot control his impulses to grab and repeat what he hears.  But, thanks to OT and his coping mechanisms, strangers have no idea that I'm not just a horrible, white-trash mom who thinks it's funny when her kid curses.  But, I've accepted that "I'm that mom"; there are far worse tragedies in life than being the trashy lady in the store with the unruly kid.